I am not able to carry children.
I have tried countless times. I have seen all the doctors needed in the State of California, city of Fresno. But still, I come short every time.
I ask myself at night, is it me? What have I done to deserve a life with no children?
In my culture, having children is a must. Your parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents want five, seven, ten children, running around and laughing while you’re preparing dinner for them, caring for them, loving them. It’s what I’ve always wanted, and when I thought, “finally, it’s the time in my life to have children.”, I am told I cannot.
Reproductive technology has always been in the back of my mind, lingering as a ray of possibilities but also a sign of fear.
Yes or No? Is it safe? What are the chances?
Three years later, surrogacy has brought me a beautiful baby girl whom I love wholeheartedly.
I never looked back to the time I wondered, for when I did, I see her shining in front of me. My baby girl, Hope.
Written by: A mother from Fresno, California
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